Advertisement

Niebla gris (Italian translation)

Advertisement
Italian translation

Nebbia Grigia

Questa nebbia grigia si dissiperà
Solo per te
La certezza adesso è quello che
Non c'è in me
 
Più ho bisogno di una
E la sento
Più realmente
Se tu mi dici
 
Sei bella così come sei
Sei bella così come sei
 
Sembrerà
Una trappola nascosta o la mia fantasia
Questo amore che in me è più irrazionale
Di quello che mi dai
 
Io ho bisogno di te
E mi ritrovo
Solo se
Tu mi dici
 
Sei bella così come sei
Sei bella così come sei
 
Tu non usi la ragione
Nemmeno dai senso
Al come né al perché
Sarà la mia vanità?
Sarà che ancora mi fa bene
Se ancora ascolto
(Se ancora ascolto)
 
Sei bella così come sei
Sei bella così come sei
 
Perché tu sei bella così come sei
(Nemmeno dai senso al come né al perché)
Sei bella come io ti vedo
(Sarà la mia vanità? Sarà che mi fa bene?)
 
Sei bella
Sei bella
Sei bella
 
Sei bella
Dì che bella
Così come sei
 
Translation done by Alma Barroca. In case you want to reprint it, please ask for permission first and always cite my name as its author. /
Tradução feita por Alma Barroca. Caso você queira reutilizá-la, por favor peça por permissão antes e sempre cite meu nome como o do autor.
Submitted by Alma Barroca on Wed, 09/05/2018 - 23:04
Last edited by Alma Barroca on Fri, 11/05/2018 - 23:51
Author's comments:

Thanks to DarkJoshua for providing useful tips of improvements.

Spanish

Niebla gris

Laura Pausini: Top 3
See also
Comments
DarkJoshua    Wed, 09/05/2018 - 23:54

È bello vedere un tentativo di tradurre in italiano. It's actually quite good, but I have some questions and some suggestions:
- Why is "la certeza" translated as "una certezza"? I'm curious about the change of the article, both "la" and "una" sound fine to me in Italian.
- "Ma ne ho bisogno di una" this sentence needs to be analysed. First of all, it's grammatically incorrect to use "ne" and "di una" together. In a sentence like this "ne" stands for "di una", so either you say "ne ho bisogno" or "ho bisogno di una" (the latter still doesn't sound correct, because you need to complete the sentence).
For example: Compare "ho bisogno di una penna" with an imaginary dialogue where person A says "ho una penna" and person B replies "me la presti? Ne ho bisogno". As you see, person B could say "ho bisogno di una penna", but to shorten it he uses "ne".
Big problem, though, is that "más" doesn't mean "ma": there's a difference in Spanish between "más", which equals "più" in Italian, and "mas", which is a less common way to say "pero" and it's usually translated in Italian as "ma" or "però". It's the same difference between "mais" and "mas" in Portuguese.
Now I need to mention the rest of the stanza: the lack of punctuation in the original (again) got me confused as well, but after a while I could understand the real meaning. If we add a comma and swap some words, we get "Más la necesito/ Y la siento/ Realmente, si/ tú me dices (que...)". That said, I suggest the following correction: "Ho più bisogno di lei e la sento più realmente, se tu mi dici". I chose to duplicate the "più" to make it clearer, as that structure doesn't work in Italian. Don't forget: "lei" refers to la nebbia.
- Why is "as I know you" translated as "come io ti vedo"? I would have said "come ti conosco" or even better "così come sei". Not implying that it's wrong, I can get what you mean, mine is just a question.
- In "Una trappola nascosta o la mia fantasia/ Sembrerà" I'd swap the two verses, otherwise it looks like "sembrare" refers to the following line and that wouldn't make sense.
- "Solamente se" is not what the original says. Normally, in Spanish, "solo" means "alone, lonely", while "sólo" is "only". I don't know if Spaniards actually follow this rule, but still, in this case it looks like he's saying he's alone (btw, why is she using masculine adjectives now?). It's better to correct it to "così solo, se".
- Why is "como" translated as "forma"? Normally, "come" is used: "nemmeno dai senso/ al come né al perché" .
- "Sarà che ancora mi fai bene"-> "Sarà che ancora mi fa bene" ("hace", not "haces").
- "dica che sei bella"-> "di' che sei bella" (you're using the "Lei", which sounds way too formal in this context).
I've got one last remark: you use the subject pronouns too often. It doesn't sound bad, because you're not using them in each sentence, but in most sentences here they aren't really necessary. You can use them, if you want, no problem with that, but the less the better. A native speaker would have probably dropped most of those you used, but, as I said, as long as you don't use them in each sentence, it won't sound bad, just a bit unnatural. That said, hope I helped you and hope to see more of these translation to Italian.
PS: dimmelo, se preferisci che ti parli in italiano, così da avere anche la possibilità di rispondere in italiano. Ho usato l'inglese perché di solito è così che comunichiamo, ma so benissimo che non hai problemi a capirmi. A presto.

Alma Barroca    Fri, 11/05/2018 - 23:36

Ciao! Grazie per il tuo commentario. Ancora non sono fluente in italiano, quindi solo provo di tradurre canzone più brevi e semplici. So che non sono perfette, ma con il feedback di utenti come te e Marco (Hampsicora) posso imparare più cose e sapere cosa devo (o no) fare Regular smile

Scriverò in inglese perché anche se so che sto scrivendo meglio, ancora ho paura di sbagliare in testi più lunghi.

1. I actually don't remember why. I did this translation late at night, maybe I was just out of my senses... It's just an article, but it can change a lot on understanding.
2. I corrected the lyrics following what's in the booklet - as I'm not a fluent Spanish speaker, I didn't add any punctuation because I could drastically change meanings of words and general understanding of song lyrics. Thought it was better to do so, maybe a fluent Spanish speaker can come and add them, if necessary. I agree with you. I'll change that line and add a comparative, removing the 'ma'.
3. The 'You're beautiful as I know you' makes no sense for me (I have never seen this construction - I often see 'You are beautiful the way you are'), but it could also mean that whoever the song is directed to thinks/sees her as beautiful, but maybe she actually isn't. Again, late night work... Maybe 'come sei' would suffice.
4. As for personal pronouns, I guess that as I learn more of Italian, I'll stop using them - as I often do with my Portuguese or English translations. Just a matter of time Wink smile

I'll correct the translation now taking all your suggestions in consideration. Thank you for taking time to help a new learner Regular smile

DarkJoshua    Sat, 12/05/2018 - 13:08

No problem, glad to be helpful. I like your translations and your Italian is getting better and better, I can see that.
Concerning that "beautiful as I know" line, it doesn't really make much sens to me either. Thought it meant something like "you are beautiful for what you show to me", that's why I thought of "così come sei" because I thought they meant "as you appear to me". But sometimes some lines in songs don't really have a meaning and words are thrown in quite randomly.