Sibirskie morozi (Сибирские морозы) (English translation)

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Russian

Sibirskie morozi (Сибирские морозы)

 
Я не прошу судьбу вернуть тебя ко мне,
Я знаю, счастье не приходит дважды,
Плыву по ветру, но река моя в огне,
А я всего лишь парусник бумажный.
В поту холодном просыпаюсь, боль в груди
Мне не даёт забыть прощальные объятья,
Последний крик любви, последнее "прости",
И тело нежное твоё под летним платьем.
 
Я не забуду тебя никогда,
Твою любовь, твою печаль, улыбки, слёзы,
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы.
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы.
 
Вино допито, свет погас, но дом чужой,
Чужая жизнь, чужая женщина разбудит,
Но боль потери не расстанется со мной,
Пока истерзанное сердце биться будет.
 
Пускай тепло твоё останется с тобой,
А мне мой лёд несбыточных желаний,
Я стал одним из всех, сольюсь теперь с толпой
И поплыву в потоке разочарований.
 
Я не забуду тебя никогда,
Твою любовь, твою печаль, улыбки, слёзы,
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы.
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы.
 
Я не забуду тебя никогда,
Твою любовь, твою печаль, улыбки, слёзы,
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы.
А за окном всё так же стонут провода,
И поезд мчит меня в сибирские морозы...
 
Submitted by Mikitevich on Fri, 28/10/2011 - 16:34
Align paragraphs
English translation

Siberian cold

Versions: #1#2
I don't ask fate to bring you back to me
I know happiness doesn't come twice.
I'm floating on the wind, but my river is on fire
and I am but a mere paper boat.
I wake up in a cold sweat, this pain in my chest1
won't let me forget our farewell embraces
the last scream of love, the last "sorry",
and your tender body under a summer dress.
 
I shall never forget you,
your love, your sadness, your smiles, your tears.
And the wires keep moaning outside the window,
as the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
And all the same the wires moan outside the window,
and the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
 
The bottle is empty2, lights are out, yet I don't feel at home3,
in this place or in my life4. A stranger5 will wake me up,
but the pain of loss will not leave me
as long as my ravaged6 heart keeps beating.
 
Let your warmth stay with you,
and I'll keep the ice of elusive desires.
I'm just a nobody now7, I'll blend again into the crowd
and drift away in a stream of disillusion.
 
I shall never forget you,
your love, your sadness, your smiles, your tears.
And the wires keep moaning outside the window,
as the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
And the wires keep moaning outside the window,
as the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
 
I shall never forget you,
your love, your sadness, your smiles, your tears.
And the wires keep moaning outside the window,
as the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
And the wires keep moaning outside the window,
as the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.
 
  • 1. meaning his heart hurts, but I kept the "medical" metaphor
  • 2. "wine has been entirely drunk"
  • 3. "my home is alien"
  • 4. "my life is alien [too]"
  • 5. woman
  • 6. "war-torn"
  • 7. "I've become [again] one among all"
Submitted by ingirumimusnocte on Fri, 26/10/2018 - 04:47
Added in reply to request by Olenka
Last edited by ingirumimusnocte on Sun, 28/10/2018 - 18:13
Comments
ingirumimusnocte    Fri, 26/10/2018 - 04:51

Oups, je me suis trompé de langue Regular smile Je vais arranger ça.

Igeethecat    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 15:56

Упс, он плывёт по ветру, не плюёт Wink smile
одним из всех — actually means ‘the same as the others’, not ‘the only one’

боль в груди
Мне не даёт забыть прощальные объятья, и т.д.
== it;s one sentence

ingirumimusnocte    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 16:31

Oops... I should have looked it up Regular smile

Thanks, I'll fix those (and in the French version too).

BlackSea4ever    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:12

My chest hurts - maybe: my heart aches
--
And all the same the wires moan outside the window, ---> And outside windows is wires' unchanging moan
and the train rushes me to the Siberian cold.

Wine has been drunk, lights are out, yet my home feels alien, ---> wine was drunk, lights are out, yet home feels strange,
as do my life. A stranger woman will wake me up, ---> strange life, strange woman will wake me up.
but the pain of the loss will not leave me ---> but pain of loss will not part from me
as long as my ravaged heart keeps beating. -- yours is perfect!

--
and with me the ice of elusive desires. --> and as for me - it's the ice of elusive desires
I had become the only one, now I'll blend again into the crowd --> I had become one of many, now I'll blend into the crowd
and drift away in a stream of disillusion. -- Just perfect!
--

From Philadelphia with love

ingirumimusnocte    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:17

Good points. I'll see what I can make of them.

Just about this "стал одним из всех". I'm not sure I really understand what he means.
Is it "I was unique among all" or the contrary "just one among many"?
The first solution seems a lot more logical to me, like "I was your only one" but the Russian rather seems to mean the opposite.
I'm confused Regular smile

BlackSea4ever    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:26

I am so frequently confused... Embarrassed smile
But in this case, I think he is expanding on being one of many blending into crowds (of many)

ingirumimusnocte    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:27

ok, so that would be "I've become (again) one among many", not "I had become", right?

BlackSea4ever    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:33

I became one of many and now I will blend -- I prefer this. Which means nothing. Lol
Or
I had become and now I would blend

ingirumimusnocte    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:36

I can't think of a way to avoid sounding a bit clumsy in English. Why not a rephrasing like "I'm but a nobody now"?

BlackSea4ever    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 17:44

Why not? You control the strings of words!
I believe we put a bit of ourselves in translations and if you want a certain image, then your words not anyone's opinion matters the most.

Sometimes, suggestions are very helpful, for example, [@lizzard] gave me suggestions for Blue and Green that expressed just what I wanted to convey. Better than I did! Made we wonder if she would share her art as well.
Btw, If you watched the video, it had beautiful blue and green.

ingirumimusnocte    Sun, 28/10/2018 - 18:00

Yep, I followed that work on the Russian version. Quite interesting. I might even use it to improve my French version, I'm not really proud of it right now.

Igeethecat    Mon, 29/10/2018 - 00:38

He WAS her only one, now he is not, he is just ‘one among many’, ‘one of many’ (people, not her lovers), etc.
But he is not just a “nobody”, though if you say ‘nobody to you’ or something like that it would make more sense.

Gotta be a French thing again Teeth smile

ingirumimusnocte    Mon, 29/10/2018 - 00:54

"I'm a nobody" basically means "I'm utterly unremarkable", with an idea of self deprecation, which seems appropriate here.
The literal translation from Russian sounds awkward to me. I would not use "one among many" in this context.
It seems to me it's used to count things, like in "one among many to try something", "one among many reasons why..."
"I am one among many" doesn't sound right to me.
French would use another wording, something like "I no longer have a name" or "I no longer am anybody [special]"